“I have seen some things, at Whitewater. I have seen the American enormity and I have seen — it almost goes without saying — enormous Americans. I have seen the obese, the augmented, the implanted, and the steroidal. I have seen boobs the size of butts, and butts the approximate size of bumper cars. I have seen stretch marks in geographic profusion, and every kind of scar, from every kind of delivery system — the sinkholes left by bullets, the crenellations left by knife, the apocalyptic lightning left by scalpel and surgical saw. I have seen people comparing scars, to while away the time. I have seen piercings in Babylonian profusion, and nail art in colors found not in the rainbow but rather in boxes of Froot Loops. And I have seen tattoos — oh, Lord, I have seen tattoos. I have seen devils and angels, Satan laughing and Christ Jesus weeping; I have seen people who have turned themselves into walking tombstones, sporting memorials for the dead, and the etched images of departed loved ones, both human and canine; I have seen soldiers who will never escape their inked dogtags, scholars and patriots with the Declaration of Independence written on their backs, and endless scrolls of text rendered illegible by time and known only to those who wear them on their skin. I have seen every form of erotic invitation and advertisement, not just tramp stamps but entire tramp field maps, and mothers of three and four and five with cobras and Tasmanian devils arising from their bikini bottoms. I have seen all the evidence I need that America, far from being a Christian nation, is at heart a pagan one, with democracy, at last, turning into a preference for the most personalized decoration.
But here’s the thing about waiting in line at Whitewater, here’s the lesson that you learn from the spectacle of America in the raw: It works.”
— The Whitewater Scandal and Our Two Americas in the Raw, by Tom Junod - Esquire
